Saturday, January 5, 2013

Craftin' it up.

Hebrews 6:19
We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, strong and steadfast.

Last summer some things were happening in my life that I wasn't quite liking nor understanding. When I came across this verse, it just struck me so well. It reminds me to never give up on myself. It reminds me that hope does exist and hope will carry you through life so much more than thinking things will constantly be in the rut they are in. So when my fellow crafting ninjas got together the other night, I knew I wanted to make something so I could see it every day. The one above I ended up giving to a friend that night. The second one is now hanging on my wall and I can't help but smile every time I see it.

Monday, December 17, 2012

twenty-seven acts of kindness.

I've read some amazing posts and poems that have brought me to tears on what happened Friday morning. As I sit at my computer trying to put words of my own out in the world, it's hard to do. I am not a mother, but I am an aunt and I am a godmother. All I wanted to do was leave work and go hug the girls and give my nephew the biggest smooch ever the second I heard the news. I couldn't imagine as I saw them all later in the day how it would feel if one of them were at that school. If one of them didn't get to spend another second in our lives.

Those that lost their lives will always be remembered. All over the place I see people doing this. It's why I decided to join in on the twenty-seven acts of kindness. I don't plan on posting it or anything like that, but I love the concept behind it.

It's hard knowing we live in a world where people have this evil inside them that drives them into committing such horrifying acts as taking innocent lives. It's even harder knowing that no matter what sort of laws they instate, something like this could happen again. One thing a tragedy brings out in others is love. Love for those in your lives, kindness towards people you've never met, and knowing that you should never take anything for granted. I pray for the families and community that have to endure this and hope somehow, someway they can find their own peace.

Monday, November 19, 2012

Being Thankful: Days 8-13

. : day eight : . 
I friggin' hate exercising. (Obviously.) Maybe one of these days I'll be like those weirdos who get super excited about working out. Until then, I am thankful that I appointed Michelle, Brandie, and the famous Gym Nazi herself Amanda aka Hitler to yell at me daily so I get off my lazy bum and do the Hip Hop Abs program. You know what they say, 5th times the charm! 

.: day nine : .
 It's the little things we sometimes forget to be thankful about. The ability to get up in the morning and walk. Being able to hear when someone is speaking to you. Smell, touch, and taste. And for me this morning, I realized how thankful I am for all of these especially for my vision because without it I wouldn't be able to see how beautiful fall is right in my own front yard. 

. : day ten :
 Growing up Brandie and I didn't exactly get along. We'd call each other names, get into fights, sometimes a bloody nose would happen (ahem), and she would tell me stuff like how my Barbies came alive at night or how ghosts flew over my bed trying to kill me - ya know, all that normal siblings stuff. I am SO thankful we grew out of that stage and became as close as we are now. She is someone I can tell anything to and is the first person I go to for advice. I have no clue what I would do without my big sister! 

 . : day eleven : .
 I found it fitting to make today's post about my Grandpa who is a World War II Veteran. I've been completely blessed to have him in my life! He will be 90 years old in a couple months, and I can't even imagine what all he has seen in his life especially during all the trips him and my Grandma used to make. He has a huge heart for his family, the hardest working person I know, and would never pass up a moment to have a cup of coffee if you came out to his house. Even though his health isn't like it used to be and sometimes his memory is foggy he still has that snarky personality we all love. There is never a dull conversation with him, and I am thankful to be his *cough favorite cough* granddaughter! 

I also wrote a little something here about my Grandpa being a solider. 

. : day twelve :. 
 Today I am thankful that I'm learning how to just let things go especially things I have no control over. I still may not respond best in situations, but I know I'm getting there. 

. : day thirteen : . 
Today I am thankful that Emily  and I completely kicked butt and got EVERYTHING caught up today at work!

Sunday, November 18, 2012

Sunday Confessions V2

i must confess.....

i'm totally giving up on nanowrimo.... it's not in me this month and i'm okay with that. i do love my new take on yet another version of Just Call Me Gus. we'll see where i go with it

i watched breaking dawn yesterday and i friggin' love that they changed it.... that book was like a walking into some bad fanfiction.  i was so disappointed in how that plot was. i don't care what anyone says: "imprinting" is gross. if the book had that massive twist that the movie had i probably would have enjoyed it. though by the second 'ahhh omg what is this?!' moment i did get really ticked and teary eyed. don't mess with my favorite.

i haven't done dishes in a week.... when you live by yourself i guess you can say it's okay, but when you make almost every meal at home, it's really not. some people have suggested i take up paper plates, but after doing a paper on how badly mother nature hates us i say it's my little 'going green' moment.

i've been listening to country music on my own free will.... i don't know what is wrong with me.

this song pretty much sums out how i plan on spending the rest of the day....

Sunday, November 11, 2012

The Story of a Solider.

My Grandpa in Germany during World War II 

Growing up, I knew my Grandpa had served in the army, but I always knew it was something he didn't like to talk about. We know from history that a lot of those who were lucky enough to come back from any war keep things buried deep inside, and they do this rightfully so.

In 2008 I had went out to my Grandpa's house and visited him on his birthday. He has always been the type of man who likes to tell stories or give his opinion. During that visit he started to tell me about his life when he was younger. I asked him if he had enlisted in the army and he laughed and shook his head.

"I got a letter in the mail saying your friends of family of America have asked you to serve your country in the US Army," he told me.  "The first thing I thought, friends and family, my ass!" 

He went on to tell me where he spent most of the time in Germany, and some of the buddies he made over there. He didn't mention how he was a Sargent or how he won all the medals that are in a box up in his attic. He didn't talk about how hard it was or how scared he was even though I knew he had to have been especially at such a young age. Instead my Grandpa, being who he is, told me more comical stories that involved him having too many drinks. Like how he wound up with a huge dagger tattoo on his right arm that has a snake wrapped around it.

"Me and a buddy had to be in Chicago just for about a day or two before heading back to Germany. Your Aunt Marie was living there at the time and after I visited with her, me and him hit the bars. The next morning I woke up on your Aunt Marie's floor with a big bandage on my arm. I ripped it off and seen this thing on there. Don't ask me how I got it and don't ask me what it's supposed to say on the handle there because I didn't know back then either!  And that's why, Amber Dawn, you should never get drunk in Chicago."

My Grandpa served his time in the army and stayed in Germany until the war had ended. He said he could still remember being in that abandoned mansion with his troop. They were celebrating, and one of them realized a German troop was doing the same on the other side.

"And all I could think was I sure as hell hope someone gave those Germans the memo the war was over." 

When he came back to the states he continued his life in Michigan where he met my Grandma. I asked him if it was love at first site and he laughed so hard. "All we did was fight the first six months we knew one another. Come to think about it, that never really stopped.  Ma was quite the woman, ya know." He wasn't lying. My Grandma was as tough as nails and he loved her. Together they had four children, two boys and two girls and one day decided to move their family from Michigan to California where my Grandpa worked many different jobs then became a truck driver. Around the time my mom was sixteen my Grandpa moved them to Missouri to the town where I currently live. He still worked as a truck driver and invested in real estate where my grandparents rented out business buildings,  houses, and ran a liquor store for a while. His full-time job of truck driving went down to part-time and finally my Grandpa hung his hat up and "retired" to running his own farm and cattle.

During those years him and my Grandma traveled like crazy. Their house was filled with family and two overly hyped up blonde girls, my sister and I, who loved being out on the farm whether it be fishing or riding on the tractor. In 1996 my Grandma passed away due to a stroke and one year later, my Grandpa lost his youngest son.  Looking back, I have so much admiration for this this man. He was so strong during all of it. He always, no matter what has ever happened, continued to move forward.

Three weeks after I had sat at his kitchen table listening to him tell stories of his life while he drank his coffee and I drank Dr. Pepper, I received a shocking call that he was possibly having a stroke. I drove out there, checked on him, and after much time my mother finally convinced him to go to the hospital. That possible stroke turned out to be many strokes. A couple weeks later another massive stroke hit him. We weren't for sure if he was going to make it. It seemed that he was just going to give up. I think because of his strong will, or quite possibly the fact that the man is the most stubborn person alive, decided he wanted to go home and that's where he went. He still gets to live on his farm, not by himself anymore, but with the help of others he still moves forward.

In two months my Grandpa will be turning ninety. Ninety. Can you imagine living that long? I can't begin to imagine all the things he has seen or expericed in his life. Because of the strokes he now suffers from dimensia so I regret never getting to really ask him things because he doesn't quite remember. There are still moments where I walk into the door and he yells out a big, "Hello Amber Dawn!" We all take advantage of his good days. Letting him tell us the same story, even though we have heard it five times before, or share something new. I know I will never work as hard in my life as my Grandpa has. Having him in my life and knowing the things he has accomplished constantly inspires me.

I thank him for serving his country. 

I thank him because he was raised in a generation of respect and always held it high.

I thank him for coming back from war and living his life to the fullest when so many weren't given that chance.

I thank him for reminding me how lucky I truly am.

And I thank all soldiers from the past, present, and future that continue to fight for the United States of America so that you and I can live here in this freedom we sometimes forget we have.

My Grandpa, Veterans Day 2012, talking to his great-grandson.

Saturday, November 10, 2012

And on the 10th day of NaNoWriMo, I really loose my mind.

I had been slacking majorly when it came to my cult story idea for NaNoWriMo. I barely reached over 7K on the 7th day. In my mind the most logical thing to do was to keep fighting it. Try to write this story that was  like pulling teeth. On the 8th day, I told my writing buddy Cheryl that I couldn't do it. This story was just not in me even though I thought it was.

So, I've switched my story up. On the 10th day of NaNoWriMo, I'm starting ALL OVER. Crazy? Yes. Will it get done? I have no idea. Can I even write anymore? Of course. Am I torturing myself because I've decided to tackle my baby novel, Gus? Yes. Yes. Yes. This time I'm going for a young adult novel again. More so because I need to know how her life was her senior year of high school.  All the events that lead up to the one reason why she took off running from her home town. Maybe if I can really figure it out, I can write the story that has been brewing around in this head of mine since 2008.

Or I could just go freaking crazy and dump it again. You know, whichever happens to go first. 

How is your NaNoWriMo going? Stuck in a rut? Wanting to pull your hair out yet? 

Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Being Thankful: Days 1-7

This is just a lil' something-something that I (along with half the population of Facebook) have been doing. Now I'm spreading my thankfulness onto here. Really, even on the most craptastic days, we all have something to be thankful about. This little meme type thang reminds me of that. 

. : day one : .
Even on tiring weeks like this, I am still so very thankful for my job at OMC and the great group of ladies I get to work with!

. : day two : . 
I am thankful for my nice and comfy bed that I refuse to get out of for another 10 minutes.

. : day three : .
Being an aunt is a pretty awesome gig. I wouldn't trade Nanner, Case, or Gatman for the world. I hope each of these little demons know how much I love them, and how thankful I am to be called Annie :)

. : day four : . 
Sometimes a girl just needs a day where she can get some stuff done, but still be lazy in between. I am thankful today is that day. 

 . : day five : . 
 I may not be where I want to be in life, but I am thankful I'm not where I used to be. 

 . : day six : . 
 I may not agree with a lot of people running today, but I am thankful I live in a country where I can make up my own mind to decide who is better for the job. Go out and vote today!! 

 . : day seven : . 
 I am thankful, not just today but everyday, for my faith, the power of prayer, God's grace and love, and for everything He has blessed me with.